Three old ladies were sitting side by side in their
retirement home reminiscing. The first lady recalled
shopping at the green grocers and demonstrated with her
hands, the length and thickness of a cucumber she could buy
for a penny. The second old lady nodded, adding that onions
used to be much bigger and cheaper also, and demonstrated
the size of two big onions she could buy for a penny a
piece. The third old lady remarked, "I can't hear a word
you're saying, but I remember the guy you're talking about."
Love them rob keep em coming mate lol
Wife the other day had been to a carboot sale, came back with a mirror, got it for a tenner, apparently it's a magic mirror. I was out at work, came back saw her and said 'wtf, where did you get those?' her chest bulging and all. She told me about the magic mirror I'm thinking 'silly b*stard' She told me to ask the mirror anything and it'll grant you whatever you want. Later on, went upstairs, it's there on the back of the bathroom door so thought id give it a go 'mirror mirror on the door, make my d*ck touch the floor' - my bloody legs fell off.